I had a cystoscopy done on me. They wanted to check to see if I had any kidney stones, abnormalitys to my bladder and kidneys. They gave me pain meds to take but don't want to take them. My co-workers were surprised to see me at work but if I stayed home I would not have gotten any rest, no one to do anything for me. I ignore my pain and do what I have to do.
I have to wait at least 2 weeks for the results. It just means more meds for me to take.
Not much is going on. Everything is the same old same. I really do not want to complain about people any more. My life is not that exciting so I don't have much to report at the moment.
I will try to write more later.
Bye for now.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
Dec. 12, 2011
Don't you hate it when you feel like you go from one frying pan to another. I think that is what has happened to me. I have a roommate who does not care about me and I thought he did. What a fool I am? He told me about what his ex's did to him but does he ever ask me about my ex's no. I don't want to talk about them.
All I ever got from them was to be used. He treats me the roommie like my father, and ex's husband and the last boyfriend. 1st ex's did not want a wife, he wanted his visa card so that he can go to work here in the US not to work on some cattle ranch/farm for $2 something an hour. I paid for his visa boy did I get ripped off, the only thing good that came out of it was my son.
My 1st ex would rather go out get drunk with his friends, do drugs (claims he never did but knew better) have sex with other women the come home want to have sex with me. He would not ever spend any time with me or do anything with me. I put up with this for a few years. Then I had my own little affairs, my 1st husband was never there, every time we would get into a fight he would run to his friends. We only had one vehicle so I was left on foot. My mom helped him to get a job where she worked out, from what I understand my Aunt caught him in the vehicle with another woman. The last straw was when the girls started coming to the house, his friends and their dog come to the house and killed a cat and my ex did nothing to stop it. Then I found out the cops were watching the house. I rather loose my ex than loose my child and son. Maybe we could have gotten past our infidelties don't know.
I think the only thing that save my ex from trying to beat me because at that time my temper was very bad and I would have beat the crap out of him and if I could not hurt you with my fist I would pick up something and hit them with it. My 1st ex said I pulled a knif on him and pulled his gun on him, well I may have on the gun because all he ever did was play with it then when we had our child I was afraid that the my child would play with it because my ex never put it up the gun that is. I was so red that instead of shooting my ex I through the gun outside. I even went to mexico to meet my inlaws I never felt welcomed. I felt like an outsider, I was even told to go to the market by myself. Yeah right my the only white woman in the town full of mexicans. Maybe he wanted me to get kidnapped don't know. I tried to do my share of the work but felt like it was not appreciated my attempts. The last time I went my ex told me he wished I never went with him. I have feeling he was playing around on me down there.
My second husband he was just full of anger . He blamed everyone for his problems, not getting promoted at school, for the jobs he had. He even blamed his own people he was hindu. I also don't think he wanted a real marriage. I think he was like the first ex husband, wanted to be married and play at being single. I don't think he wanted to be seen with me in public either, maybe he was afraid that someone might see us together that he did not want too. I was blamed even for my people. We were not married long enough to get his visa, he kept waiting on the attorney he hired or he did not listen to the attorney. We were married but never lived as a married couple, he lived in another city and me in Kansas. Then he got a job in Phoneix, AZ then somewhere in Georgia. Last time he came up we got into while we was in Wichita, KS he had to get his finger prints all over again. He did not even want me to go with him to Wichita, KS. It was like he was ashamed to have been seen with me.
The roommate just told me what his ex wives done to him and he does not care, only cares about his sister and nephew would do anything to protect them. Lucky them I did not have that luxury. I fought my own battles with the exes and my dad. Why is he with me if he does not care about anyone anymore? Roommate excuse he has ADD/ADHD.
My dad was okay but did not start to hit me until I was 16 years old. My mom or brother done nothing to protecct me. My dad has kicked me and my mom out of the house 2 times. Once when we got into it physically over a prom dress because him and mom were fighting that day. My mom always went back to the man. He hit me over a look I gave him, friends and school. He even kicked me out of the house over jobs because I quit one job to work another job and did not tell him. No way I can work one job getting up at 4 am to work at 7 am then get off at 3:30 pm to work the other job at 5 pm until closing time and when you work fast food you do not get off on time. No one has ever stood up for me. My dad helped me to get out of mess with some people, where I stayed where I should not have been, using my body for food and place to sleep instead of getting a job and finding my own place, working on gett myself out of that situation. My dad did help me with 500 deductible to get my truck fixed but other than I wish my dad and I was close but don't think it will happen. To him I am nothing but a slut, whore, lying bitch etc that is what he has called me. Maybe I am what he has called me I don't know.
I just wish I can find someone nice, who can accept me for who I am, not because of what others has done.
I guess enough feeling sorry for myself.
All I ever got from them was to be used. He treats me the roommie like my father, and ex's husband and the last boyfriend. 1st ex's did not want a wife, he wanted his visa card so that he can go to work here in the US not to work on some cattle ranch/farm for $2 something an hour. I paid for his visa boy did I get ripped off, the only thing good that came out of it was my son.
My 1st ex would rather go out get drunk with his friends, do drugs (claims he never did but knew better) have sex with other women the come home want to have sex with me. He would not ever spend any time with me or do anything with me. I put up with this for a few years. Then I had my own little affairs, my 1st husband was never there, every time we would get into a fight he would run to his friends. We only had one vehicle so I was left on foot. My mom helped him to get a job where she worked out, from what I understand my Aunt caught him in the vehicle with another woman. The last straw was when the girls started coming to the house, his friends and their dog come to the house and killed a cat and my ex did nothing to stop it. Then I found out the cops were watching the house. I rather loose my ex than loose my child and son. Maybe we could have gotten past our infidelties don't know.
I think the only thing that save my ex from trying to beat me because at that time my temper was very bad and I would have beat the crap out of him and if I could not hurt you with my fist I would pick up something and hit them with it. My 1st ex said I pulled a knif on him and pulled his gun on him, well I may have on the gun because all he ever did was play with it then when we had our child I was afraid that the my child would play with it because my ex never put it up the gun that is. I was so red that instead of shooting my ex I through the gun outside. I even went to mexico to meet my inlaws I never felt welcomed. I felt like an outsider, I was even told to go to the market by myself. Yeah right my the only white woman in the town full of mexicans. Maybe he wanted me to get kidnapped don't know. I tried to do my share of the work but felt like it was not appreciated my attempts. The last time I went my ex told me he wished I never went with him. I have feeling he was playing around on me down there.
My second husband he was just full of anger . He blamed everyone for his problems, not getting promoted at school, for the jobs he had. He even blamed his own people he was hindu. I also don't think he wanted a real marriage. I think he was like the first ex husband, wanted to be married and play at being single. I don't think he wanted to be seen with me in public either, maybe he was afraid that someone might see us together that he did not want too. I was blamed even for my people. We were not married long enough to get his visa, he kept waiting on the attorney he hired or he did not listen to the attorney. We were married but never lived as a married couple, he lived in another city and me in Kansas. Then he got a job in Phoneix, AZ then somewhere in Georgia. Last time he came up we got into while we was in Wichita, KS he had to get his finger prints all over again. He did not even want me to go with him to Wichita, KS. It was like he was ashamed to have been seen with me.
The roommate just told me what his ex wives done to him and he does not care, only cares about his sister and nephew would do anything to protect them. Lucky them I did not have that luxury. I fought my own battles with the exes and my dad. Why is he with me if he does not care about anyone anymore? Roommate excuse he has ADD/ADHD.
My dad was okay but did not start to hit me until I was 16 years old. My mom or brother done nothing to protecct me. My dad has kicked me and my mom out of the house 2 times. Once when we got into it physically over a prom dress because him and mom were fighting that day. My mom always went back to the man. He hit me over a look I gave him, friends and school. He even kicked me out of the house over jobs because I quit one job to work another job and did not tell him. No way I can work one job getting up at 4 am to work at 7 am then get off at 3:30 pm to work the other job at 5 pm until closing time and when you work fast food you do not get off on time. No one has ever stood up for me. My dad helped me to get out of mess with some people, where I stayed where I should not have been, using my body for food and place to sleep instead of getting a job and finding my own place, working on gett myself out of that situation. My dad did help me with 500 deductible to get my truck fixed but other than I wish my dad and I was close but don't think it will happen. To him I am nothing but a slut, whore, lying bitch etc that is what he has called me. Maybe I am what he has called me I don't know.
I just wish I can find someone nice, who can accept me for who I am, not because of what others has done.
I guess enough feeling sorry for myself.
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Dec. 10, 2011
Don't you get tired of making a list of things you think you need even if it is useful items. I sit at my computer and I am making a list both of materialistic and non-materialistic items.
My list of improvements on myself. I want to become a better cook, make healthier meals. I want to build up my self confidence, my self esteem. I want to find love, and acceptance.
My list of things I want in my life. I want bookcases, shelves for my books and craft supplies, an extra tv for the bedroom, house. I table for my computer and another for me to craft on etc.
These list are never ending alwasy changing, that is life. It is a constant change. I keep marking off my list of things but then I am adding back to it. Oh well that is life.
I will try to find other things to talk about. I am tired of complaining about my life.
One lesson I learned today. when you do the dishes make sure the fork prongs are turned the other direction. I stuck the fork prong between my thumb and nail. It hurt like a mother and it bled. Any how enough for tonight.
My list of improvements on myself. I want to become a better cook, make healthier meals. I want to build up my self confidence, my self esteem. I want to find love, and acceptance.
My list of things I want in my life. I want bookcases, shelves for my books and craft supplies, an extra tv for the bedroom, house. I table for my computer and another for me to craft on etc.
These list are never ending alwasy changing, that is life. It is a constant change. I keep marking off my list of things but then I am adding back to it. Oh well that is life.
I will try to find other things to talk about. I am tired of complaining about my life.
One lesson I learned today. when you do the dishes make sure the fork prongs are turned the other direction. I stuck the fork prong between my thumb and nail. It hurt like a mother and it bled. Any how enough for tonight.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Dec. 4, 2011
Is it me or what. Where do people learn how to drive. I made a left turn, into the left lane, was going to get turn on my turn signal to get into the right lane, the people behind me go directly into the right lane. I had to go around the block to so that I can make a deposit to my acccount. If that is not the case you have someone cutting in front of you without a moments notice.
I spent way to much money. I have this idea. I need to make a grocery list for each store I go to, The Health Food Center. I want to try eating gluten free foods see if that will help with my sugar. I know I cannot get completely way from glutens but I can try. I also want to go to the Asian stores, as well as the craft and other stores. I need to make a list for each store I go to. I always spend way to much money. I watched this video on you tube about budget grocery shopping. It made since you plan your meals, check your frig, pantry and spice/bake goods to see what you have and don't have. I always buy something like green peppers or mushroom and not use them all then they go to the garbage because they rot, icky. She suggested when you plan your meals, plan them where you can use the rest of green pepper, mushroom etc.
I bought pizza for my supper. My sinuses are bothering me, another reason to start eating better. I was invited to go next door for movie, but I in turn invited them for pizza because I wanted to share. I she don't do pizza. Yeah right. I did not tell her where I bought it from.
I also spent money online for some die cuts for my die cut machine. I moved an end table into the living room to set my small christmas tree. I went to the craft store as well, got my cookie cutters to make some ornaments out of, found a recipe online for applesauce & cinnamon ornaments but I have some left over gharam masala spice. It has salt in it so I don't like to use it much bcz i forget that it has salt and use it on the food, then my food because to salty. I am kind of wondering what it will smell like. I thought I had some applesauce in the frig but I think I threw it out. I included the link on how to save money on groceries at the bottom of this post.
I did get my ultra sound to see if my kidneys and bladder are still in place and nothing out of the ordinary. I however have to wait until Wednesday for the results. I also have to remember to turn in my Beneficiary form to my employeer.
The roommate said he will be home on Sunday. Said I may have to come get him, his car is acting up. I hope he makes it all the way home and I do not have to go get him.
I guess enough gripping for tonight.
http://youtu.be/MSMxgWPjaGo
I spent way to much money. I have this idea. I need to make a grocery list for each store I go to, The Health Food Center. I want to try eating gluten free foods see if that will help with my sugar. I know I cannot get completely way from glutens but I can try. I also want to go to the Asian stores, as well as the craft and other stores. I need to make a list for each store I go to. I always spend way to much money. I watched this video on you tube about budget grocery shopping. It made since you plan your meals, check your frig, pantry and spice/bake goods to see what you have and don't have. I always buy something like green peppers or mushroom and not use them all then they go to the garbage because they rot, icky. She suggested when you plan your meals, plan them where you can use the rest of green pepper, mushroom etc.
I bought pizza for my supper. My sinuses are bothering me, another reason to start eating better. I was invited to go next door for movie, but I in turn invited them for pizza because I wanted to share. I she don't do pizza. Yeah right. I did not tell her where I bought it from.
I also spent money online for some die cuts for my die cut machine. I moved an end table into the living room to set my small christmas tree. I went to the craft store as well, got my cookie cutters to make some ornaments out of, found a recipe online for applesauce & cinnamon ornaments but I have some left over gharam masala spice. It has salt in it so I don't like to use it much bcz i forget that it has salt and use it on the food, then my food because to salty. I am kind of wondering what it will smell like. I thought I had some applesauce in the frig but I think I threw it out. I included the link on how to save money on groceries at the bottom of this post.
I did get my ultra sound to see if my kidneys and bladder are still in place and nothing out of the ordinary. I however have to wait until Wednesday for the results. I also have to remember to turn in my Beneficiary form to my employeer.
The roommate said he will be home on Sunday. Said I may have to come get him, his car is acting up. I hope he makes it all the way home and I do not have to go get him.
I guess enough gripping for tonight.
http://youtu.be/MSMxgWPjaGo
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Nov. 30, 2011
Not much going on lately. I have come home from work not feeling good. I think it is the change in the weather. I feel tired alot.
I did however call the urologist to see if someone got my ultrasound scheduled. I have a bladder infection that has not gone away for over a month now. I have not heard from the doctor or the nurse. I so badly want to get to feeling better. I have a slight headache, it is right behind the eyes and a small sore throat. It is one of those things when you feel like just staying home and pulling the covers up over your head.
It is tough living alone. I wish I had someone in my life who really cared about me, wanted me for me. Not for them. You know what I mean. I mean I am there if a person needs me but when I need them or ask for help I am not that lucky. I am a nice and carrying person. I have a good heart and lots of love to give to someone who is deserving.
I feel like I complain more in these blogs. I really have no idea as to what to talk about or write about. I can write about how my day goes but again I feel like I complain more.
I want to try my hand at writing small stories, but I do not know how much detail to give, how raunchy I can get without someone blowing a head gasket and reporting me to the blogger authorities.
I guess I will try to write more later this week.
I did however call the urologist to see if someone got my ultrasound scheduled. I have a bladder infection that has not gone away for over a month now. I have not heard from the doctor or the nurse. I so badly want to get to feeling better. I have a slight headache, it is right behind the eyes and a small sore throat. It is one of those things when you feel like just staying home and pulling the covers up over your head.
It is tough living alone. I wish I had someone in my life who really cared about me, wanted me for me. Not for them. You know what I mean. I mean I am there if a person needs me but when I need them or ask for help I am not that lucky. I am a nice and carrying person. I have a good heart and lots of love to give to someone who is deserving.
I feel like I complain more in these blogs. I really have no idea as to what to talk about or write about. I can write about how my day goes but again I feel like I complain more.
I want to try my hand at writing small stories, but I do not know how much detail to give, how raunchy I can get without someone blowing a head gasket and reporting me to the blogger authorities.
I guess I will try to write more later this week.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Nov. 24, 2011 Turkey Day
Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Eat the pig save the turkey, lol. Just kidding.
I hoped everyone had a wonderful holiday. I fixed broccoli, rice and cheese casserole, pumpkin pie squares and deviled eggs. I took them over to my roommates sister and shared Thanksgiving with her and some of her family.
I want to say I am thankful for my family, friends. I am happy to be alive, roof over my head and to have my pets with me. I am so grateful to get up out of bed, seeing a beautiful sun rise on my way to work, the beautiful sunsets, the beautiful scenry. I am grateful that my truck starts every day and gets me back and forth to work, the stores. I am glad for the lessons that life has put forth, the things I need to learn.
I do miss my mom, son and the rest of my family every day. I even miss the roommate. I am blessed to have them.
No I will not be doing the Black Friday shopping. Shopping at Walmarts Supercenter & Crest grocery stores before a holiday was a mess,I really do not want to do that on Black Friday. I am sometimes okay with the crowds but this is one time I would rather have not gone shopping. I will not fight with people for items I want to get family and friends for Christmas. My son has or gets what he wants for Christmas and I do to at times so when that happens that is our Christmas. I will pay the full prices for things than worry about sales even though they would be good deals.
My plan is to get up Friday morning, go to Big O's to have the oil changed in the truck and to figure out why my maintenance light keeps coming on and off. After that I have no idea. I put a stop payment on Freedom Debt Relief, so I am not sure how much money will be going out of my account. One of the main reasons I need to have my trucked looked out and not sure how much it will cost to get it fixed, and I don't know if I will have to pay the rent again or not, you know cover the roommate butt.
I will chat with you all later.
Bye for now.
I hoped everyone had a wonderful holiday. I fixed broccoli, rice and cheese casserole, pumpkin pie squares and deviled eggs. I took them over to my roommates sister and shared Thanksgiving with her and some of her family.
I want to say I am thankful for my family, friends. I am happy to be alive, roof over my head and to have my pets with me. I am so grateful to get up out of bed, seeing a beautiful sun rise on my way to work, the beautiful sunsets, the beautiful scenry. I am grateful that my truck starts every day and gets me back and forth to work, the stores. I am glad for the lessons that life has put forth, the things I need to learn.
I do miss my mom, son and the rest of my family every day. I even miss the roommate. I am blessed to have them.
No I will not be doing the Black Friday shopping. Shopping at Walmarts Supercenter & Crest grocery stores before a holiday was a mess,I really do not want to do that on Black Friday. I am sometimes okay with the crowds but this is one time I would rather have not gone shopping. I will not fight with people for items I want to get family and friends for Christmas. My son has or gets what he wants for Christmas and I do to at times so when that happens that is our Christmas. I will pay the full prices for things than worry about sales even though they would be good deals.
My plan is to get up Friday morning, go to Big O's to have the oil changed in the truck and to figure out why my maintenance light keeps coming on and off. After that I have no idea. I put a stop payment on Freedom Debt Relief, so I am not sure how much money will be going out of my account. One of the main reasons I need to have my trucked looked out and not sure how much it will cost to get it fixed, and I don't know if I will have to pay the rent again or not, you know cover the roommate butt.
I will chat with you all later.
Bye for now.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Nov. 22, 2011
Not much going on today. I woke up, went to work, help a coworker or two out.
Why do people wait until the last minute to go to the grocery store? Especially when there is like 3 days left until Thanksgiving. I swear the grocery store was full of people. They do not get out of your way, if your not careful you either get blocked or ran over. People are not that polite or courtious. I guess I am a bit old fashion. Then they don't have what your looking for on the shelf or it is empty. I think within about 2 minutes I was ready to get the you know what out of there and go home. Note to self: Do not call roommate to complain. He thought I was asking for the rent I guess. Did not read his text. Oh well men.
I stopped at Little Casears for pizza but had to wait 10 minutes, so I went next door to Ribs N More got some ribs, 2 sides for about $19.60. I ate half and saved the other half for work. The weiners where happy they got 2 bones each.
Came home, cleaned up dog messes. My little weiners don't like going out in the cold and even though I laid out newspaper and left some doors open to circulate the rooms with heat, they decided the bedroom was the best place to go. So after I cleaned up their mess I vacuumed the floors. I made sure the messes were cleaned up before I vacuumed.
I was getting my computer set up and downloaded some music off of some cd's I bought. My eject button did not want to work. I could go through my computer right click and eject that way but could not use the keyboard to eject. So I called Dell they sure did fix me up. I sure wish that my life was that easy to fix.
After all that his sister (roommate sister) called, wanted me to go see if her son was eating, I guess he turned off his phone and she could not reach him. I went over to the house and let her and him talk on my phone. She wanted me to go to Sonic to get him something to eat. I did, did you know that Sonic closed at 10 pm. Yep they sure did. I called his sister to tell her, told her I would fix him a sandwich when I got back to the house. I fixed 2 grilled cheese sandwiches, and along with a coke took over to their house. Now I am not a fortune teller but I have no clue or idea why they (Sonic) closed at 10 pm.
Any how I have to decide if I want to put up my little prelit Christmas tree or go buy a large tree. I may see if I can find one that is not prelit. I want to use it for all year around.
My son called today while at work as well. I guess his grandpa passed away in Mexico. I felt so bad for him. I wish I was there with him giving him a hug and all. All I could do was comfort him over the phone. I wish that I was able to do more.
Any how enough complaints for this evening.
Why do people wait until the last minute to go to the grocery store? Especially when there is like 3 days left until Thanksgiving. I swear the grocery store was full of people. They do not get out of your way, if your not careful you either get blocked or ran over. People are not that polite or courtious. I guess I am a bit old fashion. Then they don't have what your looking for on the shelf or it is empty. I think within about 2 minutes I was ready to get the you know what out of there and go home. Note to self: Do not call roommate to complain. He thought I was asking for the rent I guess. Did not read his text. Oh well men.
I stopped at Little Casears for pizza but had to wait 10 minutes, so I went next door to Ribs N More got some ribs, 2 sides for about $19.60. I ate half and saved the other half for work. The weiners where happy they got 2 bones each.
Came home, cleaned up dog messes. My little weiners don't like going out in the cold and even though I laid out newspaper and left some doors open to circulate the rooms with heat, they decided the bedroom was the best place to go. So after I cleaned up their mess I vacuumed the floors. I made sure the messes were cleaned up before I vacuumed.
I was getting my computer set up and downloaded some music off of some cd's I bought. My eject button did not want to work. I could go through my computer right click and eject that way but could not use the keyboard to eject. So I called Dell they sure did fix me up. I sure wish that my life was that easy to fix.
After all that his sister (roommate sister) called, wanted me to go see if her son was eating, I guess he turned off his phone and she could not reach him. I went over to the house and let her and him talk on my phone. She wanted me to go to Sonic to get him something to eat. I did, did you know that Sonic closed at 10 pm. Yep they sure did. I called his sister to tell her, told her I would fix him a sandwich when I got back to the house. I fixed 2 grilled cheese sandwiches, and along with a coke took over to their house. Now I am not a fortune teller but I have no clue or idea why they (Sonic) closed at 10 pm.
Any how I have to decide if I want to put up my little prelit Christmas tree or go buy a large tree. I may see if I can find one that is not prelit. I want to use it for all year around.
My son called today while at work as well. I guess his grandpa passed away in Mexico. I felt so bad for him. I wish I was there with him giving him a hug and all. All I could do was comfort him over the phone. I wish that I was able to do more.
Any how enough complaints for this evening.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Nov 21, 2011
I think I have jinxed myself. I told the universe I was going to kiss ass to pay off my debt. Big mistake. My roommatge still has not payed me back for Nov. rent and I know I will have to pay Dec. rent. Now I do not know what to do. I was going to take the rent money he paid me back to double up on my Dell computer bill then once it is paid off work on Bank of America.
Roommate called thinks I should file bankruptcy. He thinks that I make more money than he does. He works on a freaking oil rig. He also gets overtime. How in the hell am I making more money than he is. Also said that I can find a bankruptcy attorney for about $500. The ones I have talked to wants at least $1500.00.
My day at work went okay. Kind of boring I am trying to study so I can pass 1 exam then that would leave 2 more for me to pass for 1 certification. I am so tired of school but I also want to keep working. I feel so conflicted when I get home. I want to craft, study, cook & clean, but I am not wonder woman. I sure wish I was.
I don't know if I should start writting for real or not, like selling my stuff. I don't think I am there yet.
I will catch you all later.
Roommate called thinks I should file bankruptcy. He thinks that I make more money than he does. He works on a freaking oil rig. He also gets overtime. How in the hell am I making more money than he is. Also said that I can find a bankruptcy attorney for about $500. The ones I have talked to wants at least $1500.00.
My day at work went okay. Kind of boring I am trying to study so I can pass 1 exam then that would leave 2 more for me to pass for 1 certification. I am so tired of school but I also want to keep working. I feel so conflicted when I get home. I want to craft, study, cook & clean, but I am not wonder woman. I sure wish I was.
I don't know if I should start writting for real or not, like selling my stuff. I don't think I am there yet.
I will catch you all later.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Nov. 20, 2011
Three more day and I am no longer on call. Yippee.
I wish I was smarter than the average bear. I feel like an idiot. I am going have to pay rent again, the darn roommate has not yet paid me back for last months rent. Last night he got to punching buttons on my computer disconnecting me from the internet while I was in the middle of doing something. If I done that while he was playing his game in the middle of a raid. I would be called selfish, rude etc. I have thought about taking him off line.
Now I have 2 bills that will not get paid this month. Thanks roommate. Your all heart and thought, not. I don't think he has a heart accept what is between his legs that is his only heart. I know I am not being very nice. I am just a bit upset.
I will catch you all later.
I wish I was smarter than the average bear. I feel like an idiot. I am going have to pay rent again, the darn roommate has not yet paid me back for last months rent. Last night he got to punching buttons on my computer disconnecting me from the internet while I was in the middle of doing something. If I done that while he was playing his game in the middle of a raid. I would be called selfish, rude etc. I have thought about taking him off line.
Now I have 2 bills that will not get paid this month. Thanks roommate. Your all heart and thought, not. I don't think he has a heart accept what is between his legs that is his only heart. I know I am not being very nice. I am just a bit upset.
I will catch you all later.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Nov. 19, 2011
I am not sure what to do with myself today. I am on call so that means lugging my work laptop where ever I go along with the pager. I could have went out with the roommates sister to the movies but I just don't want to get called to work in the middle of enjoying a movie.
I miss my mom. She called wanted to sell some thing of mine and wanted to know if her friend can have my yarn. To late she is already using it but I really don't mind. I need it get it all used up.
The dogs and I are doing just fine. They seem to get along with the roommate. The only time they go outside if I take them out, I sometimes have to shut the back door or they will come back in with me. They will not stay outside on their own. They bark at anything and anyone. Even lights from cars passing by at nights. They are just like little children you tell them to stop, they just ignore you, lol, but eventually they stop barking. I took them out to play ball this evening they seem to enjoy that as well.
I love to watch craft & cooking videos on you tube. Thank god for DVR I can record craft shows on tv since they don't come on when you home. I know they are reruns but they have some good ideas. They do make things look so easy. Even the home improvement shows are the same but I like the idea of making your own decorations for your house.
Now I just need someone to go with me to the thrift stores and rummage sales. I need a couple of lamps and storage solutions not only for my kitchen but for my crafts and maybe for my clothes. I do hate digging through boxes, they are labeled but bye the time I find the box I am looking for I am out of the mood.
I am trying to manage my time, 1 hr for studying, crafting, cooking (that always takes longer than an hr bye the time you get your food cooked, ate and then you have to do the dishes) & some reading time just so hard. Plus your having to fit in house hold chores. If someone has a some ideas on how to do this better I sure would love to hear them.
The roommate and I get along okay at times, but thinks I should drop everything I am doing for his sister, she wanted me to go to the movies but I am on call. He had to ask me the percentage of me getting called to work but he don't get it or understand. I am not going to miss a movie because the server went down or the archiver hung up and the system crashed it could take up to 1 hr or longer ot get the system back up. I have to call this person and that person to find out what is going on and why. I also never know if I will have to get called to go into the office either. He thinks he knows my job but he does not. I can get called in the middle of the night because the system decided to go on a protest. I also have to make sure that the programs that are schedule to run dont get interrupted or if they crashed I have to reschedule them. I am not going to spend my time not watching a movie to do this. I would have lost my $8.00.
He thinks me and his sister don't get along but I am not like them\. I don't treat people like they are there for me. I don't walk into someone house, even if I had a key to their house I would not walk into their house like I own it and take things whether they belonged to me or not. I don't knock on someone door and then proceed to walk in either. But this has been done to me. What if I was laying naked on the sofa, or what if I was making out with the roommate her brother etc. I honestly think that is rude but I guess I was brought up to formal and not informal. She has come in gotten dog food she has bought for his dog which he no longer has, she has the dog, made snide remarks that the food I bought was crappy and when I went home to visit my mom and son, made remark about furniture I brought back with me. I went to rummage sales with my mom, son and neighbor. I enjoyed my time with my family don't need someone to make the time I spent with them seem worthless, useless. I would not ever do that to someone related or not.
The first picture is of Whino, not because he drinks but because he whines a lot he is suppose to be part poodle and Pekingese . He is still home with my mom.He is almost a 1 yr old.
This is Brutus you cannot have Brutus without Caesar. E tu Brute. He is Caesar older brother. They had the same mom and dad but different litter. He is also with me in Tuttle, OK.
This old man is Rickey. He is probably about 8 years old. No matter what he is feeling he loves to play. He can be limping with artheritis. He is going thru health problems having allergy to fleas or grass not sure. Needs an allergy shot. I told my mom to let me know how much they are and I would help. He is suppose to be my sons dog, lives with my mom.
This is Sassy the sister to Brutus and Caesar. She is the same age as Brutus they come from the same litter. You have to be careful with here she loves to give licks, if your not careful you will get frenched kiss. Always best to keep your mouth closed.
This is of Caesar He is 4 yrs old. He likes to dig holes also the only weiner that I know of that would play in a water puddle. He is with in Tuttle, OK . She is more of my son's dog than mine or moms but will sleep with me when I am home for visits. She also lives with my mom.
This is Smokey. She loves to be petted. Rather stay outside than come inside when it is warm out, in the winter she is inside. Lives with my mom.
This is ChewChew named because he sneezed alot. Also very spoilt. My mom tried to get me to bring him back with me but I think she is very attached to this cat. She would miss him a bunch. Also lives with my mom.
I miss my pets and my mom I would love to find a house here in OKlahoma somewhere close to Oklahoma City, OK or a small town like Tuttle, Oklahoma. I love the peace and quiet.
My son lives with my mom and has a job I am so proud of him. When I moved to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. I don't think he wanted to be here with me. He did finish his school here but we were not getting along so I took him back to my moms house.
Any how enough gripping.
I miss my mom. She called wanted to sell some thing of mine and wanted to know if her friend can have my yarn. To late she is already using it but I really don't mind. I need it get it all used up.
The dogs and I are doing just fine. They seem to get along with the roommate. The only time they go outside if I take them out, I sometimes have to shut the back door or they will come back in with me. They will not stay outside on their own. They bark at anything and anyone. Even lights from cars passing by at nights. They are just like little children you tell them to stop, they just ignore you, lol, but eventually they stop barking. I took them out to play ball this evening they seem to enjoy that as well.
I love to watch craft & cooking videos on you tube. Thank god for DVR I can record craft shows on tv since they don't come on when you home. I know they are reruns but they have some good ideas. They do make things look so easy. Even the home improvement shows are the same but I like the idea of making your own decorations for your house.
Now I just need someone to go with me to the thrift stores and rummage sales. I need a couple of lamps and storage solutions not only for my kitchen but for my crafts and maybe for my clothes. I do hate digging through boxes, they are labeled but bye the time I find the box I am looking for I am out of the mood.
I am trying to manage my time, 1 hr for studying, crafting, cooking (that always takes longer than an hr bye the time you get your food cooked, ate and then you have to do the dishes) & some reading time just so hard. Plus your having to fit in house hold chores. If someone has a some ideas on how to do this better I sure would love to hear them.
The roommate and I get along okay at times, but thinks I should drop everything I am doing for his sister, she wanted me to go to the movies but I am on call. He had to ask me the percentage of me getting called to work but he don't get it or understand. I am not going to miss a movie because the server went down or the archiver hung up and the system crashed it could take up to 1 hr or longer ot get the system back up. I have to call this person and that person to find out what is going on and why. I also never know if I will have to get called to go into the office either. He thinks he knows my job but he does not. I can get called in the middle of the night because the system decided to go on a protest. I also have to make sure that the programs that are schedule to run dont get interrupted or if they crashed I have to reschedule them. I am not going to spend my time not watching a movie to do this. I would have lost my $8.00.
He thinks me and his sister don't get along but I am not like them\. I don't treat people like they are there for me. I don't walk into someone house, even if I had a key to their house I would not walk into their house like I own it and take things whether they belonged to me or not. I don't knock on someone door and then proceed to walk in either. But this has been done to me. What if I was laying naked on the sofa, or what if I was making out with the roommate her brother etc. I honestly think that is rude but I guess I was brought up to formal and not informal. She has come in gotten dog food she has bought for his dog which he no longer has, she has the dog, made snide remarks that the food I bought was crappy and when I went home to visit my mom and son, made remark about furniture I brought back with me. I went to rummage sales with my mom, son and neighbor. I enjoyed my time with my family don't need someone to make the time I spent with them seem worthless, useless. I would not ever do that to someone related or not.
The first picture is of Whino, not because he drinks but because he whines a lot he is suppose to be part poodle and Pekingese . He is still home with my mom.He is almost a 1 yr old.
This is Smokey. She loves to be petted. Rather stay outside than come inside when it is warm out, in the winter she is inside. Lives with my mom.
My son lives with my mom and has a job I am so proud of him. When I moved to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. I don't think he wanted to be here with me. He did finish his school here but we were not getting along so I took him back to my moms house.
Any how enough gripping.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Nov. 17, 2011
I am so pisst. OOPS I mean upset. I know that my roommate does not feel good but I feel like that I am alone. I have now to clean out the oven on the stove because he is to ill to do so. He cooked a pizza not on a pan or cookie sheet directly onto the grates. Now the house stinks like something burnt. I will have to go clean it up. Now if I wanted a corn dog too, him and his nephew at them all. I am so tired of this freaking craop. If I want to cook something or fix something I cannot because the ingredients or the item is gone and no one tells me a freaking thing.
He checked the oil in the truck yesterday, did not even ask if I had any to put in the truck. Said he would do it when I got home. Do you think it happened? Nope, he is laying on the sofa watching TV. I put a quart of oil in my truck. Do you think he cares about me? Nope. I am to eat whatever freaking junk is in the house. Does he replace what he uses up, nope. I pay the utilitlities and groceries thinking that they should equal up to what the rent is. Now I am still waiting for him to pay me back for the rent, do you think that has happend? Nope. He said he wants to me my mom. I plan on going then if his sister or other adoptive family needs him he drops me for them. I am so tired of this.
All I want to do is stand on my own two feet. To hell with everyone. I just want my debt caught up and to find a house and another vehicle.
Sorry for being in a bad mood.
He checked the oil in the truck yesterday, did not even ask if I had any to put in the truck. Said he would do it when I got home. Do you think it happened? Nope, he is laying on the sofa watching TV. I put a quart of oil in my truck. Do you think he cares about me? Nope. I am to eat whatever freaking junk is in the house. Does he replace what he uses up, nope. I pay the utilitlities and groceries thinking that they should equal up to what the rent is. Now I am still waiting for him to pay me back for the rent, do you think that has happend? Nope. He said he wants to me my mom. I plan on going then if his sister or other adoptive family needs him he drops me for them. I am so tired of this.
All I want to do is stand on my own two feet. To hell with everyone. I just want my debt caught up and to find a house and another vehicle.
Sorry for being in a bad mood.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Nov 16, 2011
I have been such a big baby this evening not even sure why. I guess I am ultra senstive. I am stressed and worried about my mother. I wish she was here so that I can help her.
My job seems okay. I have this one co-worker. I keep wondering about him. He is very smart but I wonder how can a programmer not know his way around a computer. I think he is getting the job but it is a lot to absorb.
My roommate mentioned something about the dogs not being pottied train. They will go out to potty if you go out with them. They do go on news paper but they are also in a new place so having to learn your way around and doing things is going to take time. I have so far got them to go outside but only if I go with the, but now it is getting colder that may not always happen. My little weiners do not like the cold.
I am still unsure about the freedom debt relief program so I guess tomorrow I am going to talk to a credit union to see if they can help me. I really want a house of my own. I want so much to have my own place so that I can have my mom and the rest of the pets. I am dreaming of it every day.
I also need to force myself to sit down and study for my exams so I can finish my class but by the time I get home I am just out of the mood.
I guess I will chat with you all later.
My job seems okay. I have this one co-worker. I keep wondering about him. He is very smart but I wonder how can a programmer not know his way around a computer. I think he is getting the job but it is a lot to absorb.
My roommate mentioned something about the dogs not being pottied train. They will go out to potty if you go out with them. They do go on news paper but they are also in a new place so having to learn your way around and doing things is going to take time. I have so far got them to go outside but only if I go with the, but now it is getting colder that may not always happen. My little weiners do not like the cold.
I am still unsure about the freedom debt relief program so I guess tomorrow I am going to talk to a credit union to see if they can help me. I really want a house of my own. I want so much to have my own place so that I can have my mom and the rest of the pets. I am dreaming of it every day.
I also need to force myself to sit down and study for my exams so I can finish my class but by the time I get home I am just out of the mood.
I guess I will chat with you all later.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Nov. 15, 20111
Hey!!! Did you miss me? Yeah, not, lol. I brought 2 dogs back with from visiting my mother. I hope my roommate pays me back for rent this week so I can give the landlord $300 deposit for them. So now when I am alone I have company. I love my pets.
I miss my mom. She is having to have eye surgery, once week. She said something that she has fluid built back up behind her eyes. If she does not have this procedure she will go blind,. I need to get her down here with me.
I am currently sitting here watching craft shows that I saved on my dvr. I am so glad they came out with that idea. I love to watch crafts and cooking shows. I can even record a movie to watch later.
You want to know something. I am a country girl at heart. I was raised on a small cattle ranch. I long to go back. I mi ss having livestock to take care of. When winter is here we would pile on the long johns, sweaters etc to keep warm, get on the tractor to take hay out. Our tractor was open, not inclosed like some of todays tractors where you have heater, radio & ac. If I had my own farm not sure if I would have cattle or goats. I would want some sort of dairy goat or cow. Learn to make my own butter and cheese that would be fun thing to do. I miss having a garden as well only thing I had problems growing was herbs be it indoors or outdoors.
I really don't want to talk about my work. I may say something I may regret and my goal is not talk bad about someone but I do wonder why smart people act dumb. That is all I wll say on this subject.
I will be back tomorrow. I hope you all have a wonderful day.
I miss my mom. She is having to have eye surgery, once week. She said something that she has fluid built back up behind her eyes. If she does not have this procedure she will go blind,. I need to get her down here with me.
I am currently sitting here watching craft shows that I saved on my dvr. I am so glad they came out with that idea. I love to watch crafts and cooking shows. I can even record a movie to watch later.
You want to know something. I am a country girl at heart. I was raised on a small cattle ranch. I long to go back. I mi ss having livestock to take care of. When winter is here we would pile on the long johns, sweaters etc to keep warm, get on the tractor to take hay out. Our tractor was open, not inclosed like some of todays tractors where you have heater, radio & ac. If I had my own farm not sure if I would have cattle or goats. I would want some sort of dairy goat or cow. Learn to make my own butter and cheese that would be fun thing to do. I miss having a garden as well only thing I had problems growing was herbs be it indoors or outdoors.
I really don't want to talk about my work. I may say something I may regret and my goal is not talk bad about someone but I do wonder why smart people act dumb. That is all I wll say on this subject.
I will be back tomorrow. I hope you all have a wonderful day.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Nov. 12, 2011
I am visiting my mother, sitting at the table blogging and brooding about what I should haves, could have and should not have done this and that.. I wish I was out of debt so I could help my mom more. I wish I was out of debt so could by a house, another vehicle for her and for me. I wish I had a place for my pets, maybe some farm animals.
She fixes the best turkey and noodles. I am a self taught cook. I cook from recipes the majority of the time, have not yet figure out how to make them my own.
I also went to Barltesville, Oklahoma with my son. I am trying to spend time with each of them. He bought cd's and I got a couple of magazines and cd's. I seen my big ass book of craft by mark montano. I wished I could have gotten that as well. He has some really cool projects. Then we went to Walmart Supercenter. I got some baskets to put my onions and garlic in. I have some things here I can take back with me to user for storage as well. He also bought me a pair of pants for my birthday, lol.
I have got to loose some weight. I am so tired of not being able to fit into my current clothes. I know I can do it but it is finding the will power to stick with it and not get off course. I need to do this with my school, work and home life. I am so easily distracted as well. I like to make things but I am finding I don't want to finish what I started that is not good either. I sometimes wonder if I have ADD or ADHD same as what my child has.
Any how I will be back in Tuttle, Oklahoma tomorrow. I have things to take back and some dogs. I hope the landlord remembers he said i can have 2 for $300 pet deposit. I really want my own place. I need to buy a powerball ticket and pray like the wind that win something.
I will chat with you all later.
She fixes the best turkey and noodles. I am a self taught cook. I cook from recipes the majority of the time, have not yet figure out how to make them my own.
I also went to Barltesville, Oklahoma with my son. I am trying to spend time with each of them. He bought cd's and I got a couple of magazines and cd's. I seen my big ass book of craft by mark montano. I wished I could have gotten that as well. He has some really cool projects. Then we went to Walmart Supercenter. I got some baskets to put my onions and garlic in. I have some things here I can take back with me to user for storage as well. He also bought me a pair of pants for my birthday, lol.
I have got to loose some weight. I am so tired of not being able to fit into my current clothes. I know I can do it but it is finding the will power to stick with it and not get off course. I need to do this with my school, work and home life. I am so easily distracted as well. I like to make things but I am finding I don't want to finish what I started that is not good either. I sometimes wonder if I have ADD or ADHD same as what my child has.
Any how I will be back in Tuttle, Oklahoma tomorrow. I have things to take back and some dogs. I hope the landlord remembers he said i can have 2 for $300 pet deposit. I really want my own place. I need to buy a powerball ticket and pray like the wind that win something.
I will chat with you all later.
Friday, November 11, 2011
Nov. 11. 2011
I have no idea where to start. I so confused.I want out of debt so badly. I am thinking of trying Freedom Debt Relief. I also want a small farm, have some goats no cows been thru that don't want to do that again. It would be nice to have a dairy goat.
Well yesterday I travelled to spend Veterans day plus the weekend with my mom and son. The dogs were so happy to see me. As soon as I stepped into the door I had to pick up one of them up and then as soon as I was able to sit down I was way laid by them all. We have 5 dogs and 2 cats. lol. My son works nights, and I forgot where I was. Scared the you know what out of me when he walked in through the door.
I need a 2nd income but what to do, have no clue. All I know is I am tired of struggling. My roommate wants to buy my truck but I am so tired of paying money out and not having anything left. Thinks that I make loads of money, don't realize that the majority of my money goes to bills.
I guess enough complaining today. I am enjoying my time with my family. I will talk to you all later
Well yesterday I travelled to spend Veterans day plus the weekend with my mom and son. The dogs were so happy to see me. As soon as I stepped into the door I had to pick up one of them up and then as soon as I was able to sit down I was way laid by them all. We have 5 dogs and 2 cats. lol. My son works nights, and I forgot where I was. Scared the you know what out of me when he walked in through the door.
I need a 2nd income but what to do, have no clue. All I know is I am tired of struggling. My roommate wants to buy my truck but I am so tired of paying money out and not having anything left. Thinks that I make loads of money, don't realize that the majority of my money goes to bills.
I guess enough complaining today. I am enjoying my time with my family. I will talk to you all later
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